"Idiot Control" (aka "Idiot Control Now") is a song parodying the unintelligible recording scene from the episode Pod People.

Its nonsensical lyrics highlight just how bad the original song was.


Joel: "Alright, alright, let's do it again. You come in late, girls, again, and you're out! Alright. From the top!"

(music starts, singing)

"With a pickle mind

We kick the nipple beer

Steady as a goat

We're flying over trout

Ghetto down the highway

At the speed of light

All I wanna feel now

Is the wind in my eyes

Sack of monkeys in my pocket

My sister's ready to go!"

All: "Hear the engines roar now!

Idiot control now!

Hideous control now!

Ninny on the road now!

Minnie in control,

Wheels on fire,

Burning rubber tires!"

[Deep 13]

Dr. F: (at recording console) "He's pretty good!"

Frank (wearing an 'I'm a virgin' shirt): "Good? He's the best!"


All: "Blurry jelly rolls now

Hitting Lesley Gore now

Needy inches bow down

Pitying a poor boy

Here the engines roar

Bees on pie

Burning rubber tires"

(song ends)

[Deep 13]

Dr. F: (to Joel) "Great! Pretty good! What do you think?"


Joel: (giving O.K. sign) "It STINKS!"


Real Lyrics

[Note: The MST cut omits the first verse.]

With a fickle mind, we kick her into her gear

Steady as she goes, we're flying overdrive

Get on down the highway at the speed of light

All I want to feel now is the wind in my eyes

With stacks of money in my pocket,

All systems ready to go

Hear the engines roar now

Hear the engines roar now

Hear the engines roar now

Hear the engines roar now

Hear the engines roar now

Wheels on fire

Burning rubber tires


Series "MST3K Love Theme" • "Mighty Science Theater"
Season K
Season 1 "Clay & Lar's Flesh Barn" • "Commando Cody Song" • "Beverly Hillbillies Parody"
Season 2 "Sidehackin'" • "Only Love Pads the Film" • "Wild Rebels Cereal" • "My Creepy Girl" • "If Chauffeurs Ruled the World" • "The Jet Jaguar Song" • "Godzilla Genealogy Bop"
Season 3 "Tibby, Oh Tibby" • "Idiot Control" • "A Clown in the Sky" • "Hike Your Pants Up" • "Celebrity Siblings" • "The Gamera Song" • "Michael Feinstein's Gamera" • "Annoying Cornjob Song" • "Slow the Plot Down" • "The Plate Spinning Song" • "The Waffle Song" • "Cosmic Freight Train" • "Music from Some Guys in Space" • "Fugitive Alien Medley" • "Sandy Frank Song" • "A Patrick Swayze Christmas"
Season 4 "City Rap" • "Oh, Kim Cattrall" • "A Danger to Myself and Others" • "Tribute to Pants" • "Satellite of Love Marching Song" • "Ode on Estelle" • "Gypsy Moons" • "Hired!" • "The Many Tunes of Gamera" • "Gypsy Rose Me" • "Happy Thoughts"
Season 5 "What a Pleasant Journey" • "The Janitor Song" • "Killer Shrew" • "My Wild Irish Ireland" • "Joey the Lemur" • "Master Ninja Theme Song" • "Tubular Boobular Joy" • "Whispering Christmas Warrior" • "Merry Christmas...If That's Okay" • "Mystos" • "Girl in Lovers Lane Theme" • "The Greatest Frank of All"
Season 6 "Bouncy Upbeat Song" • "Who Will I Kill?" • "Supercalafragalisticexpiala-wacky!" • "United Servo Academy Men's Chorus Hymn" • "The Poopy Suit Anthem" • "Livin' in Deep 13" • "Nummy Muffin Coocol Butter"
Season 7 "Phones"
Season 8 "The Gods Jam" • "The Funky Seventies" • "Sodium!" • "Loving Lovers Love" • "Satellite Hootenanny" • "Digger Smolkin Medley" • "When I Held Your Brain in My Arms"
Season 9 "Rowsdower Saves Us" • "Air on a Delta Knight" • "The Canada Song" • "Hobgoblins" • "Where, Oh Werewolf" • "Stay!" • " Puma Man"
Season 10 "Oh, I Am Sad" • "Bobo Creek" • "To Earth"
Season 11 "Every Country Has a Monster" • "Our Love Is on Wings (You Can't See)" • "UFO" • "The Great Space Circus" • "Aloha" • "Moon 14 Mesozoic Ranch Dinosaur BBQ Theme"
Additional "1997 Summer Blockbuster Review Theme" • "1998 Academy of Robot's Choice Awards Special" • "1998 Summer Blockbuster Review Theme" • "#BringBackMST3K Theme" • "#WeBroughtBackMST3K Theme" • "Satellite of Love"
Collections Clowns in the SkyClowns in the Sky IIMystery Science Theater 3000: The Return (Music from the Netflix Original Series)Songs in the Key of MSTThe New Themes of MST3K