MST3K

This movie stops at nothing... and stays there!
- Tom Servo


The Short(s)[]

0621s1

Money Talks!

Main article: Money Talks! (short)

Having trouble saving money, a kid gets advice from Ben Franklin himself.

Progress Island, U.S.A.

Main article: Progress Island U.S.A. (short)

Modern Puerto Rico has a lot to offer.

The Movie[]

Beastmovie

Tor Johnson in The Beast of Yucca Flats

Main article: The Beast of Yucca Flats (film)

A Russian scientist is changed into a brute by radiation and briefly menaces a family in the desert.

The Episode[]

Host Segments[]

SOLPaintingParty

Mike & the Bots wallpaper the SOL

Prologue: Mike and the Bots are wallpapering the SOL. The patterns aren't matched up, mostly because they're not the same pattern. Gypsy does not react as expected.

MST3K Beast Of Yucca Flats.avi 2-17 screenshot

Gypsy freaks out over the new wallpaper

Segment One: Proposition Deep 13 proposes to speak for the Mads in the form of the feature film's overt badness. Candidate Mike Nelson responds for the SOL with a stirring speech from Tom Servo and fanfare from Crow's horn. However, the fact that the film is from Coleman Francis causes some backpedaling from Mike and the gang.

Beastcrow

Crow's film anti-preservation presentation

Segment Two: The SOL's nice quiet afternoon is interrupted by a visit from some noisy teen party-ers. Crow takes them up on their offer to join the festivities.

Segment Three: Crow wants to know if it's 11:30 yet. There are many times at which it is not 11:30, as Mike constantly tells him.

Segment Four: Crow offers a plea for film anti-preservation to help bad films deteriorate more quickly. Mike disapproves, but Crow doesn't care.

CrowLunch

Crow wants to know if it's 11:30 yet

Segment Five: The Bots read letters of congratulations, and Mike gives his victory speech after defeating Proposition Deep 13. Dr. F gives his concession speech. He then slaps Frank. A lot.

Stinger: The beast is very angry.

Obscure References[]

  • "Proposition Deep 13"
A reference to the "Culture War" speech during the 1992 Republican National Convention, in which terms like "counter-culture" and "Contract with America" were employed.
  • "Need I describe how he stood with us before the goons of Peabody Mining?"
The Peabody Award is awarded for excellence in storytelling in television or radio. MST3K won one in 1993.[1]
  • "Alfred Hitchcock!"
Ben Franklin appears only in silhouette, a trademark of the title sequence for the television series "Alfred Hitchcock Presents".
  • "Tom Bosley's come to haunt him."
Ben Franklin's portly shadow is compared to actor Tom Bosley.
  • "You talkin' to ME?"
Quote from the 1976 film "Taxi Driver" as character William looks in the mirror.
  • "Hey c'mon over, they got Rick Wakeman's 'Journey to the Center of the Earth'! Woo!"
Crow is excited that the partying teens will play prog-rock concept album " Journey to the Center of the Earth" by keyboardist Rick Wakeman.
  • "Who's the cat who'd risk his life for fellow man? Shaft!"
Mike pastiches the 1971 Academy Award-winning song "Theme From Shaft" as the soundtrack features a disco beat.
  • "Circle Pines is really thriving!"
The town of Circle Pines, Minnesota has a population of roughly 5,000 persons as of the 2020 census.
  • "Latka Gravis goes to class." "Thank you vedy much!"
A Puerto Rico University student has long sideburns and somewhat resembles the character Latka, portrayed by actor Andy Kaufman, on the TV series "Taxi".
  • "Parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme."
The soundtrack features acoustic guitar, riffed as background to the song "Scarborough Fair" as performed by duo Simon & Garfunkel.
  • "Valerie Harper lookalike contests are held."
Several Puerto Rican women vaguely resemble and sport 1970s hairdos similar to late actress Valerie Harper.
  • "Here, Gilligan plays a set."
A tennis player wears a bright red shirt and white bucket hat, the only attire worn by titular character Gilligan on TV series "Gilligan's Island".
  • "Then KISS came to town!"
KISS is a glam-rock band whose height of popularity was during the 1970s and 1980s. They are known for the elaborate pryotechnics and visual effects in their shows, as well as the Kabuki-style makeup of the band.
  • "Don't tell my heart, my achy-breaky heart..."
Mike provides incongruous lyrics from the hit song "Achy Breaky Heart" by country singer Billy Ray Cyrus as salsa music plays.
  • "The music of John Phillip Salsa!"
John Philip Sousa was an American composer of famous military marches. Salsa music emerged from several Caribbean influences, including Puerto Rico.
  • "When Judy Garland died it destroyed Puerto Rico's economy."
The 1969 tragic accidental overdose by actress Judy Garland is riffed over footage of pharmaceutical production.
  • "I wish it was the Breast of Yucca Flats."
The unedited version of this film included shots of the woman's bare breasts in the opening scene. That section was edited from the version shown on Mystery Science Theater 3000, though Servo exasperatedly mutters "Okay, breasts, yes, we GET it!" when the camera lingers on the woman's (clothed) chest.
  • "Will our mystery guest enter and sign in, please?"
The phrase used on the game show What's My Line? to introduce the celebrity guest round.  
  • "Helter Skelter. Very nice."
A reference to the song Helter Skelter by the Beatles, also infamously for the Helter Skelter scenario perpetuated by the Manson Family. It subsequently became the title of the all-time best-selling true crime book (co-authored by prosecutor Vincent Bugliosi) about the Manson Family killings.
  • "Benjamin Franklin was tried in the 8th Circuit Court on stalking charges. In a minute, the result of that trial."
A reference to the voice-over that ended most episodes of the TV police procedural Dragnet.  
  • "Feel the glory of the Royal Scam!"
A misquoted line from the Steely Dan song "The Royal Scam".
  • "Why do I conk my hair?"
In period African-American slang, the verb "conk" refers to processing one's hair.
  • "I'm Mike Wallace." "I'm Morley Safer." "And I'm Ed Bradley."
The ticking clock 'soundtrack' is riffed with the traditional host self-introductions of the TV series "60 Minutes".
  • "Woke up, fell out of bed, dragged a comb across my head..."
The ticking clock 'soundtrack' is riffed with Mike singing part of the song "A Day in the Life" by The Beatles.
  • "Joey Ramone?!"
The thin female victim has a shaggy haircut, similar to that of punk rock musician Joey Ramone.
  • "I'll never be your Beast of Yucca Flats..."
Servo sings a variation of the hit song "Beast of Burden" by The Rolling Stones.
  • "Marlon Brando arrives for the Larry King interview."
Famed American actor Marlon Brando in 1994 appeared on television talk show "Larry King Live" and made controversial comments. Tor Johnson has a large physique, similar to that of Brando at the time.
  • "These men are also from behind the Iron Curtain." "Pay no attention to them."
Riff on an iconic line in the movie The Wizard of Oz.
  • "It's a divining gun!"
An actor moves as if being pulled forward by his pistol. A divining rod is used in dowsing, where invisible forces pull the rod towards water.
  • "It's the KGB Mr. Benny!!"
Referring to African-American comedian Eddie "Rochester" Anderson who was a regular cast member on The Jack Benny Program as Benny's valet. The KGB were the main security and intelligence gathering agency of the former Soviet Union.
  • "He's either a ruthless agent or Schemer from Shining Time Station."
The KGB agent bears some resemblance to the character Schemer on the children's television show "Shining Time Station".
  • "It was a dark and boring night."
A play on the infamous line "It was a dark and stormy night", first written by Edward Bulwer-Lytton, often cited as a prime example of trite writing.
  • "It's Trudy."
A Local Hero reference; the protagonist named a rabbit he hit with his car "Trudy", after his ex-girlfriend.
  • "Stay live whatever occur Tor find."
A dramatic line from the 1992 movie "Last of the Mohicans" is riffed in the voice of Tor Johnson's character Lobo in The Unearthly.
  • "Been desert horse no name."
The chorus of 1971 #1 hit "A Horse with No Name" by folk rock group America is riffed in the voice of Tor Johnson's character Lobo in The Unearthly.
  • "You dare question the great Oz?!"
A mushroom cloud is compared to the pyrotechnic charade employed by Professor Marvel aka 'the Wizard' in the classic movie The Wizard of Oz.
  • "A phrenologist would have a field day with Tor's skull!"
Phrenology was a pseudoscience popular in the 19th century that held it was possible to determine a person's mental abilities and personality traits by feeling the shape of their skull.
  • "Father McKenzie. Darning his socks in the night when no one is there..."
Alluding to some lyrics from The Beatles song "Eleanor Rigby", Crow mocks the constant narration.
  • "The Killer's in Memphis, marrying his 12 year old cousin."
Jerry Lee Lewis, aka "The Killer", married his cousin who was 13 at the time.
  • "Do I look like Laura Dern? Nah."
The vacationing woman somewhat resembles actress Laura Dern.
  • "Oh! It's 'Westworld'!"
Sheriff Joe wears a cowboy hat and walks with his gun drawn, similar to character the Gunslinger, played by Yul Brenner, in the 1973 film "Westworld".
  • "They're vacationing at The Most Dangerous Game dude ranch!"
"The Most Dangerous Game" is a short story by Richard Connell in which a human being is hunted for sport. It has been adapted for film several times, and the same basic premise was used by Bloodlust!.
  • "Bit of a ripoff, huh?" "Coleman only steals from the very best."
The shot of Hank running from the plane piloted by someone shooting at him is almost identical to an iconic shot from Alfred Hitchcock's North by Northwest.
  • "He's got a high albedo."
Albedo is a measure of the reflecting power of a surface, commonly used with planets. Also a play on having a "high libido."
  • "Now the rabbit eats Tor and becomes The Night of the Lepus!"
Referring to the 70's movie Night of the Lepus which features giant mutated rabbits. When Mike Nelson replaced Joel on the SOL, Night of the Lepus was one of his training films along with The Beast of Yucca Flats.[2] Night of the Lepus would later be used by RiffTrax.
  • "Tor could have been contender, instead bum, which am."
A reference to Marlon Brando's legendary "I could have been a contender, instead of a bum, which is what I am" speech from the film On the Waterfront, said in the voice of Tor Johnson's character Lobo in The Unearthly.
  • "Tor want to make it with you."
A riff on the #1 hit song "Make it With You" by pop-rock band Bread, sung in the voice of Tor Johnson's character Lobo in The Unearthly.
  • "Tor is posing for a Rubens painting."
Flemish artist Peter Paul Rubens is now best known for his nude portraits of full-figured women, to the degree that the word "Rubenesque" has entered the language as a term for a voluptuous woman.
  • "Ricola!"
A wide angle shot of the rocky landscape is riffed with the trademark call from commercials for cough drop maker Ricola.
  • "Hills alive sound of music."
A part of the song "The Sound of Music", from the 1965 film of the same name, is sung in the voice of Tor Johnson's character Lobo in The Unearthly.
  • "They haven't gotten very far with the Crazy Horse monument."
A shot of a rugged cliff face is compared to the long-delayed construction of the Crazy Horse Memorial, begun in 1948 and to this date far from completed.
  • "Tales of the Gold Monkey!"
The gas station worker wears a captain's hat, similar to that of character Jake in the TV series "Tales of the Gold Monkey".
  • "Pigs go better with Coke."
A riff on the famous jingle 'things go better with Coke' for soda giant Coca-Cola.
  • "Pigs begin writing on the side of the barn."
A reference to the 1945 novella "Animal Farm" by author George Orwell.
  • "The dingoes took my baby!"
A quote from the Australian movie Evil Angels (titled A Cry In the Dark outside Australia and New Zealand) starring Meryl Streep, about Azalia Chamberlain, a 9-month-old baby who disappeared during a camping trip. Her parents stated that she was taken by a pack of dingoes, though many people at the time believed that they had killed their infant daughter. The line is often mis-quoted as "The dingo ate my baby".
  • "Those mediocre men in their flying machine..."
Crow accompanies unremarkable shots of a small plane taking off with a pastiche of the song "Those Magnificent Men in Their Flying Machines".
  • "Ron and Clint Howard in 'True West'."
Wandering children Randy and Art are compared to childhood actor Ron Howard and his younger brother actor Clint Howard. "True West" is a 1980 work by playwright Sam Sheppard about the relationship between two brothers.
  • "You know, the first McDonald's play-lands weren't that good."
Young Randy and Art wander the bleak desert. Fast-food giant McDonald's launched kid-friendly "PlayPlace" playgrounds attached to their restaurants in 1971.
  • "I love an Old Gold, man."
Old Gold is a brand of cigarettes founded in 1927.
  • "Hosanna...superstar..." "Stop that."
Mike objects to Servo's riffing on the song "Hosanna" from the musical "Jesus Christ Superstar" during a desert scene.
  • "Nickelodeon's 'Waiting for Godot'."
Young Randy and Art sit under a tree, much like characters in the work "Waiting for Godot" by playwright Samuel Beckett. Nickelodeon was launched in 1979 as the first cable television channel for children.
  • "Disappointing turnout for REO Speedwagon at Alpine Valley."
Randy and Art are riffed as being the only attendees of a concert by rock band REO Speedwagon, whose popularity had waned in the 1990s. Alpine Valley Music Theatre is a famous outdoor concert venue whose capacity is 30,000.
  • "One...singular sensation..."
The iconic song "One" from the musical "A Chorus Line" is sung in the voice of Tor Johnson's character Lobo in The Unearthly.
  • "Hey look! They opened a new Prange Way!"
Wisconsin-based Prange's operated a chain of bargain basement retail stores called Prange Way until declaring bankruptcy in late 1995. This episode aired in January 1995.
  • "Ask Christian Slater?"
Crow mis-hears the phrase 'ask questions later' as referring to American actor Christian Slater.
  • "This is not my beautiful gulch!"
Hank clutches at his arm, similar to the quirky movements of David Byrne in the music video for the song "Once in a Lifetime" by The Talking Heads.
  • "Just as Jim closes in for the kill, so does Mutual of Omaha close in for the kill."
Servo riffs the narration as akin to numerous episodes of TV series "Wild Kingdom", which coincidentally had a host named Jim.
  • "Harcort Fenton Mudd!  You dirty rotten lazy thing thing thing…"
Lois' appearance is riffed as akin to android character Stella Mudd, who recites a hen-pecking berating of character Harry Mudd in the episode "I, Mudd" on the TV series Star Trek.
  • "I'll permit myself one Chiclet now."
Lois is riffed as rationing herself out pieces of Chiclets gum, which are relatively small.
  • "So'd Francis promise you back-end too?"
Refers to 'residuals' or future royalties, often promised to entertainment stars but surreptitiously withheld from contracts.
  • "Young Ed McMahon!"
A wolf howl is compared to boisterous antics of the late television star Ed McMahon.
  • "High on hill live lonely goatherd... (yodel)"
A rendition of the song "The Lonely Goatherd" from the musical "The Sound of Music" is sung in the voice of Tor Johnson's character Lobo in The Unearthly.
  • "To the moon, Alice!"
The Beast gestures violently at the sky, similar to instances of character Ralph Cramden pretending to threaten his wife Alice on the classic TV series "The Honeymooners".
  • "I had a vision I was chased through the desert by Boog Powell."
Boog Powell is a former professional baseball player who has gained weight in his later years.
  • "Fired our guns but the British kept a-coming..."
Quote from the song "The Battle of New Orleans", most popularly recorded by Johnny Horton in 1959.
  • "McCloud!  You shot Penn Jillette!"
Deputy Marshal Sam McCloud of the TV series "McCloud" sported a cowboy hat, and is frequently riffed in the chiding voice of his supervisor Chief Clifford. Penn Jillette is an American magician and entertainer who happens to be of large stature.
  • "They’re gonna split him open and crawl inside to stay warm."
Refers to an iconic scene in the 1978 movie "The Empire Strikes Back".
  • "Woob...woob...woob..."
The Beast's death is riffed by slowly repeating the catchphrase of character Curly of "The Three Stooges" shorts.

Callbacks[]

Behind-the-Scenes[]

MST3K Cast[]

Regular Cast

Guest Cast

MST3K Crew[]

  • TBD
  • TBD

Notes[]

  • Unusual credits: Dr. F can be heard repeatedly slapping Frank as the credits play.
  • The host segment in which Crow keeps asking if it's 11:30 yet is an inside joke, aimed at Frank Conniff. He reportedly often skipped breakfast, so he'd frequently interrupt writing sessions by asking if it was time to break for lunch.
  • The comic book Crow is reading in the second host segment is the DC Comic Amethyst, Princess of Gemworld Vol. 1 #2 (from 1983).
  • The book Mike is reading is Lights! Action! Murder! (Cherry Delight, the Girl from N.Y.M.P.H.O. / Sexecutioner Series #23) by Glen Chase.
  • The Beast of Yucca Flats had been mentioned during the first host segment of Episode 513 as part of Mike's training in the art of riffing, where it was claimed to be a "cake walk" compared to the movies they usually watch. That assessment is contradicted by the SOL crew's despairing reactions to the film in this episode (though it is possible that Servo and Crow chose not to watch it when training Mike).

Video Releases[]

Beastyucca

MST3K DVD Cover

References[]