The tests came back and it turns out you're old...
- Mike

The Movie[]

Main article: The Leech Woman (film)

Old Mala

On a journey to Africa, an emotionally disturbed woman witnesses the secret of restoring lost youth. Unfortunately, it entails regularly sacrificing young men.

The Episode[]

Host Segments[]


The Bots with the Varmint Vac

Prologue: The Bots discover an infestation of prairie dogs and use a special vacuum to catch them. Mike is disbelieving until Servo rounds up a herd.

Segment One: Crow still can't remember Mike, much less the prairie dogs he sucked up. Dr. Peanut discovers his destiny... to wear diapers and roller skate around Deep Ape. Professor Bobo and the other apes eventually succumb to diapers and tutus, much to the disgust of The Lawgiver.

Nanite union

Tom Servo as Granny

Segment Two: The Satellite is still broken, so the gang appeals to the Nanites. They're on strike, at least until the strike is broken by a Nanite tank that squashes their union leader.

Segment Three: Pearl is enjoying some leisure time until Bobo interrupts to point out she hasn't made any laws. Pearl decrees there is no parking on Sundays and no soup with buffet. Pearl asks for suggestions from the SOL crew. Tom's laws reveal he was up to some interesting things during his universal travels.

Segment Four: The Bots want Mike to check out their pillory, but he avoids the trap.

Segment Five: Servo really, really wants to do his impression of Granny from The Beverly Hillbillies. Mike and Crow suspect Servo just wants to run around yelling "JEEEEEEDDDD!" Tom takes the role-paying too far. In Deep Ape, the apes are returning to civilized ways. It works until Peanut finds the diapers again.

Stinger: Detective defeats lawyer with LOGIC!

MST3K cast[]

Regular cast

Guest cast


  • Unusual credits: Servo yells "JEEEEEEDDDD!" over the credits.
  • Jim Mallon is listed as a writer for the last time in this episode.


Running Jokes[]

  • "JED!!!"
  • Crow still doesn't remember Mike.
  • Sally's attempts to get Neil's attention away from "Terry": "Neil! Neil! NEIL!"

Quotes & References[]

  • "Uh-oh, Ed Gein!"
Ed Gein, a serial killer arrested in Wisconsin in 1957, became infamous for making a "woman suit" from the bodies of his victims.
  • "It's Five Alive!"
Five Alive is a line of fruit juice blends created by Minute Maid.
  • "And don't forget, Nick and Honey are coming over tonight."
Nick and Honey are two secondary characters from the movie/play Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?
  • "This is when Hazelden didn't have it all worked out yet."
The Hazelden Foundation is a Minnesota-based chain of drug and alcohol rehab centers.
  • "Miss Jane Pittman and Mr. George Clinton were wed today..."
The Autobiography of Miss Jane Pittman is a novel in which a 110-year-old African-American woman recounts the events of her life, and was made into an acclaimed made-for-TV movie in 1974. George Clinton is a funk musician known for his oddball clothing and hairstyle.
  • "She dances like a drunk girl at the Blainbrook Bowl."
A bowling alley in Blaine, Minnesota located in the Blainbrook Entertainment Center, which also houses a sports bar and restaurant.
  • "Oh, Miss Havisham."
Miss Havisham is a character in the Charles Dickens novel Great Expectations. She is a wealthy spinster, once jilted at the altar, who insists on wearing her wedding dress for the rest of her life. She lives in a ruined mansion and is described as looking like "the witch of the place." Although she has often been portrayed in film versions as very elderly, Dickens's own notes indicate that she is only in her mid-thirties at the start of the novel.
  • "Have you heard the drums, Unando?"
"Can you hear the drums, Fernando?" is the first line of the 1976 song "Fernando" by ABBA.
  • "How are the rains down in Africa?" "Well, I've gotten the chance to do the things I never had."
A paraphrase of the chorus from the 1982 song "Africa" by Toto.
  • "Agnes Moorehead as Endora!"
Agnes Moorehead played Endora on the 1960s sitcom Bewitched.
  • "Man, I hate how these guys are ripping off David Byrne's music!"
David Byrne used sub-Saharan African polyrhythms prominently on the Talking Heads' album Remain in Light.
  • "He's not a very good mohel, is he?"
In Judaism, a mohel (rhymes with "soil") is a rabbi or other synagogue member trained to perform male circumcision, performed on the eighth day after birth.

Memorable Quotes[]

[Regarding the splotchy pattern behind the movie's opening titles]:
Crow: It's a Rorschach test.
Mike: I see a lot of spilled ink congealing in random patterns.
Servo: That means you're a sexual predator.
[Nurse Sally listens as Old Malla explains to endocrinologist Paul Talbot how she's lived past 140.]
Malla: When we are alone, I will speak.
Crow [as Dr. Talbot]: Well, we kinda are alone. Nursie isn't the sharpest knife in the drawer.
[The jungle explorers trudge through stage sets of Africa, interspersed with stock footage of jungle animals.]
Crow [as Guide]: Well, we'd better camp here tonight. The next stock footage is 18 miles away.
[A stock-footage lion approaches the party, who raise their guns in fear.]
Crow [as Lion]: Um... hakuna matata?
. . .
[The party finds a small, empty shipping crate in a clearing.]
Servo: I see — it's a three room Japanese apartment.
[Lawyer Neil proposes to Teri, who's wearing a silvery dress.]
Neil: Teri... would you marry me?
[Teri pulls away.]
Mike [as Neil]: Uh... uh... I withdraw the question.
Teri: Oh, Neil — I can't.
Servo [as Teri]: Starfleet forbids it.
[During one of the many "African" scenes.]
Mike: Sadly, this tribe of extras no longer exists.
[A hard-boiled detective lazily investigates the house.]
Crow: This guy's gonna die of nonchalance.
Mike: This is like a murderous episode of Lucy.

Video releases[]