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(We see Nick for the first time, as the nerdish hero gets off his plane)

This... is not our star, is it? I will not accept this as our star, sorry.

  — Crow


The Movie

Main article: Time Chasers (film)

Synopsis

A physics teacher invents a time machine in a light aircraft. When he sells his invention to a large corporation, he must soon take drastic action to prevent its misuse.

The Episode

Host Segments

Crow visits Young Mike

Intro: Tom (and Crow) want(s) Mike to use the phrase "Lost In Space", so that they can reenact Lost In Space.

Segment One: Mike docks the SOL with The Widowmaker and has an unusually neighborly chat with Pearl. Crow later joins in.

Segment Two: Tom sends Crow back in time to convince Mike not to take temp jobs in order to make his life better. The blonde, irresponsible slacker Mike of the past proves difficult to reason with.

Eddie Nelson

Segment Three: Crow returns and finds Mike's abusive brother Eddie (also played by Michael J. Nelson) there instead. Servo has now become Eddie's nervous Yes-Man and ashtray. He says that Mike's band ("Sex Factory") was actually doing very well, when Mike got hit in the head, by a girl fan's big hotel room key, and died. Says he got that job since that 'sleepy eyed guy left.'

Segment Four: Crow returns to the past and convinces Crow not to go through with his plan.

Mike & the Bots reenact "Lost in Space"

Segment Five: Crow wants Mike to refer to Gilligan's Island, but it backfires. Mike chats up Pearl again, and realizes that another Crow is in 80s Wisconsin, working at the cheese factory he used to work at.

Stinger: "Matt, it's time for you decide if you're gonna be one of my team players or not."

MST3K cast

Regular cast

Guest cast

Trivia

  • This was the first film from the 1990s to be featured on the show.
  • The Time Chasers cast and crew had a reunion party to view the premiere of the MST3K episode. While some knew what to expect, others were not pleased at the "savaging" of the original film.
  • David Giancola has claimed that Best Brains planned to use Peter Harrington, who played Matthew Paul in the film, in a cameo role, but Harrington's schedule didn't allow for this to happen.
  • Time Chasers receives a 3.5/5 star rating in the Video Movie Guide, making it one of the highest-rated films used by MST3K.
  • Ranked 10th in the Top 100 Episodes as chosen by backers of the Bring Back MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000 campaign.
  • When Eddie gets up to take a smoke break, his headset microphone is occasionally visible in the silhouette.

Callbacks

  • Mike makes a reference to "chinderwear," an invention exchange from episode 505, The Magic Voyage of Sinbad.
  • Pearl calls Crow "Art".
  • The time machine Crow uses is the same one from episode 807, Terror from the Year 5000.
  • When Eddie is filling Crow in, he mentions how "those two guys shot me up into space when that sleepy-eyed guy left".
  • Eddie also asks Servo (regarding Crow), "Do you get that guy?!" This is a callback to Monster A-Go Go, when Gypsy upsets Crow by telling him "I don't get you."
  • In Experiment #421's first host segment, the bots decide to open a cheese factory on the bridge of the Satellite of Love. In this episode (Experiment #821), when Crow goes back in time, Mike is temping at a cheese factory.

Quotes & References

  • "I thought Night Court was on."
Night Court is a sitcom that aired from 1984 to 1992 about a young, unorthodox New York City judge and the comedic cases he encounters.
  • "Co-starring Bruce Springsteen's little brother, Wayne."
The actor shown very closely resembles a young version of New Jersey rock musician, Bruce Springsteen.
  • "We could send Bob Saget to meet Charlemagne!"
Charlemagne was King of the Franks, King of the Lombards, and the Emperor of the Romans until 814. He was the first Christian king of the Western world and united most of Western Europe for the first time since the classical era of the Roman Empire and united parts of Europe that had never been under Frankish or Roman rule. Bob Saget is a modern-day comedian known for starring on the family sitcom Full House, being the first host of America's Funniest Home Videos, and telling very dirty jokes during his stand-up comedy routines.
  • "Come to Martin's. WHAT UP?!"
"WHAT UP?!" was Martin Lawrence's catchphrase on his 1990s sitcom Martin.
  • "They're in Dar es Salaam!"
Dar es Salaam is the largest city and former capital of Tanzania. It is Tanzania's most prominent city in arts, fashion, media, music, film and television and is a leading financial center.
  • "When you get caught between the Moon and New York City..."
A lyric from "Arthur's Theme" from the 1981 film Arthur starring Dudley Moore. Servo sings it as part of a seeming mishmash of lyrics from other movie love ballads.
  • (A blonde, heavyset extra is seen pacing in the background.) "I see Drew Carey's nemesis Mimi survived the Apocalypse!"
Mimi Bobeck, played by Kathy Kinney, is the overweight, outrageously made-up, flamboyantly vulgar, and vindictive nemesis of Drew Carey on the sitcom The Drew Carey Show.
  • "You're gonna give me all your Soylent Green, man!"
Soylent Green is an early 1973 film about overpopulation starring Charlton Heston. It is set in a dystopian future where Soylent Green was the only easily available food source for the masses, but the food's origins were a mystery.
  • "Michael Moore in 30 years!"
Michael Moore is a famous film director whose controversial documentaries includes Roger and Me, Bowling for Columbine, and Fahrenheit 9/11. He's a heavyset man who typically appears in public wearing a flannel shirt, jeans, and a baseball cap.
  • "What, is this Ironweed all of a sudden?"
Ironweed is a 1987 award-winning drama film starring Jack Nicholson and Meryl Streep. It is based on the Pulitzer Prize-winning novel of the same name.
  • "That guy needs chinderwear."
A reference to the Mads' invention from episode 505 The Magic Voyage of Sinbad—underwear for people with cleft chins.
  • "You and your date will be whisked away to Marian Jordan Junior High..."
This is a riff on the description of the prizes/trips won on the TV game show The Dating Game. Marian Jordan was an actress and radio personality most remembered for portraying the role of Molly McGee, the patient, common sense, honey-natured wife of Fibber McGee on Fibber McGee and Molly, a long-running radio comedy program.
  • "Dr. Demento, Patriot."
Barret "Dr. Demento" Hansen is a radio host known for playing funny or silly songs on his radio show The Dr. Demento Show. He typically wears a top hat and round eyeglasses, and has a thin white beard on his chin.
  • "Avaunt, and quit my sight, young executive."
Parody of a line from Shakespeare's Macbeth: "Macbeth: [to the Ghost] Avaunt, and quit my sight! Let the earth hide thee." (Act 3, Scene 4, Line 113).
  • "A horse! My kingdom for a horse!"
In Act 5, Scene 4 of Shakespeare’s Richard III, King Richard yells out, "A horse, a horse! My kingdom for a horse!” You can read about the analysis and its usage today here.
  • "There's a man on the wing of the plane!"
Said by William Shatner's character in The Twilight Zone fan favorite episode "Nightmare at 20,000 Feet".
  • "You wanna fly!? Let's fly!" "I gotta million of em', hot-cha-cha-cha!"
A parody of the vocal stylings of actor Jimmy Durante.
  • Crow: "He's climbing an Ent."
    Mike: "Ommm, hum, get off me."
Ents are a race of beings in J. R. R. Tolkien's Lord of the Rings fantasy world who closely resemble trees.
  • "Maybe he'll be torn apart by Ewoks!"
Ewoks are a fictional species of small, furry mammaloid bipeds that appear in the Star Wars universe. They inhabit the forest moon of Endor and live in various arboreal huts and other simple dwellings.
  • (As Nick climbs down the tree, the transport in the branches above him ominously begins to shift, causing Nick to to duck his head, fearing that it could come crashing down at any moment.)
    Mike: "Oh, Spielberg stole that bit for Jurassic Park."
Time Chasers was released in 1994 (9 months after Jurassic Park), but it was originally shot in 1990. Regardless, Giancola's tree-climbing scene was free of any influence from the similar scene in Spielberg's blockbuster (and vice versa).

Memorable Quotes

[The Edgewood Studios logo appears, showing a dog sitting in a movie theater]
Servo [as dog][talking like Scooby-Doo] Rello, I'm Fido Hitchcock, the rirector of ris rilm.
Crow: He's got a bucket of crotch-flavored popcorn.
Mike[groaning] Oh, Crow. So early, too.
[The logo fades out]
Servo[still talking like Scooby-Doo] Redgewood Rentertainment, Rimited resents—
Mike: Okay, stop.
Crow: Cut it out.
[The opening title appears over a CGI computer chip]
Crow: This is like NFL graphics here.
Mike[imitates the "NFL on Fox" theme song]
[As the movie opens, a man flies a propeller plane through some odd visual effects]
Nick: Ha-ha! Nick Miller, you are a genius!
Servo [as Nick]: A crop-dusting genius!
[We see Nick for the first time, as the nerdish hero gets off his plane]
Crow: This... is not our star, is it? I will not accept this as our star, sorry.
[We see Nick ride his bike through a small town]
Mike [as announcer]: Come on down to parallel parking days.
[Nick rides to Martin's Supermarket]
Mike: Come to Martin's. WHATUP?!?
[Nick boots up his computer]
Servo [as the old AOL voice]: You've got mail... pattern baldness!
[During the first scene in 2041]
Mike[derisively] The, uh, future.
[In a 2041 city, a 10-year-old wearing lime-green pants jogs while talking on a cellphone]
Crow: So, in the future, kids become gay agents?
. . .
Servo: So... 50 years from now will be 3 years from now...
. . .
[As Nick, Lisa, and Matt go into a building, a burly-looking woman walks by]
Servo: Hey, look—a lesbian... of the future!
[Cut to inside, where the camera pans down to a fairly typical food court]
Mike: Food courts... of the future!
[Robertson arrives to meet Nick]
Mike [as Robertson]: Hi, I'm Bob Evil!
Robertson: Trust me.
Servo [as Robertson]: Mua-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
[Nick and Lisa are trying to escape Robertson's building while also being chased by his guards. They come to a room with two routes; Nick quickly opens the door of one route and he and Lisa go down the other. The guards come in and see the open door of the false route.]
Guard: Come on, this way! [They run down the false route]
Mike [as Guard]: Even though I see them running the other way!
[Lisa arrives at the airstrip, wearing two kinds of plaid]
ServoTwo different plaids? Man, I'm a naked robot and even I know that's a fashion no-no.
Servo [as J.K.]: I leave for 20 minutes, and EvilCo is in shambles!
Crow [as Matt]: I'm a team player!
[In the dystopian future, an eyepatch-wearing armed survivor leaps atop a smashed car for a better shooting angle]
Mike [as Gunman]: Arrgh! Sixteen men on a dead Dodge Dart!
[The alarm makes a beeping noise similar to a large vehicle in reverse]
Servo: Great, now the garbage truck's backing up!
[Nick and Lisa are shown together in the new, dystopian future]
Servo: I hope they end up together... at the bottom of a well torn apart by animals!!
Crow: The movie really heightens the lack of interest in the film.
Servo: Yeah, I think—huh?
[As Nick and Lisa's plane crashes towards the rocky shore of a lake, the camera pans to the plane's altimeter]
Servo: They're running out of Alt!
[Cut to a view of the speedometer.]
Eddie: And their Miffnots [MPH KNOTS] are goin' down!
Lisa: Nick!
Crow [as Lisa]: I was shaving this morning and got a nick!
[Eddie hits Crow in the head and knocks him on the floor.]
Eddie[irritated] Get up! You're all right.
[After Robertson punches Nick out of the flying plane, Nick somehow manages to hang on with his palms flat against the smooth metal wing]
Crow [as Nick]: Ha-ha! Unlucky for you, I secrete pine tar from my hands!
[After Robertson's time transport crashes into a tree]
Crow: 27 Keebler elves were killed today when a light plane plunged into their tree!
Mike: E.L. Fudge remains in critical condition.
. . .
Mike: Oh, he's trying to get honey like Pooh!
Crow: Oh, he's like poo, all right.
. . .
[as Nick climbs down the tree]
Crow: He's climbing an Ent!
Servo[in a deep, Entish voice] Hoom hom, get off me, hm.
. . .
[Later in that scene, Robertson shoots Nick and kills him]
Crow: He died as he lived: mud-stained and splaying.
[As a static shot of a tree goes on for quite a while]
Servo: Did the tree contribute money to the film? Why are they showing this?
[Nick types in commands to erase the floppy disks containing his time travel software]
Servo: So, eight 5¼" floppies hold the keys to time travel.
Mike: Delete copies of film? Yes. Delete memory of film from mankind's consciousness? Yes.
[As he throws out the last one, the camera pans to a heap of electronics, including one suspiciously long box with a cord coming out of it]
Mike: Hey... even declared war on his surge protector...
[The credits begin to roll; a slow, low-pitched tune comes up]
Mike: Who's playing the chamber pot?!
[The writer credit appears]
Crow: Written? This movie was written? I don't think so.
[Credits display: Mathew Bruch as Nick Miller]
Servo: We serve a delicious bruch every Suh-day.
[The credits display "The Producers Wish To Thank", followed by a VERY long list of people and organizations]
Servo: Wow, they are special thanking the HELL out of this movie!
. . .
Mike: All these people bear... some responsibility, you know.
[The penultimate "thanks" are to "The citizens and officials of Rutland, Vermont"]
Servo: Which means I really, really hate the citizens and officials of Rutland, Vermont. I'm not kidding, Mike. I never liked the citizens and officials of stupid Rutland, Vermont! This is just the nail in the coffin, as far as I'm concerned. Go to hell, citizens and officials of Rutland, Vermont!
Crow: Filmed in Vermont: the other, smaller Wisconsin!

Video Release

References

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