|“||Well, better than "Quest of the Delta Burke", I suppose.||”|
|— Crow T. Robot|
- Main article: Quest of the Delta Knights (film)
In medieval times, a young boy is inducted into an ancient order of scholars and mystics to protect the secrets of Archimedes from a villainous tyrant.
- Prologue: Crow gets some hail damage, so Gypsy repairs him and gives Mike and Tom an old AMC Crow as a loaner. He runs a little rich, but has a killer radio.
- Segment One: Gypsy puts some seal coat on Crow, so he returns. Gypsy needs the loaner back because some guy's Crow got totaled by a semi. Pearl is upset over Mike's lack of misery, so she tests the experiment by switching places: She goes into the theater, while Mike goes down to the castle.
- Segment Two: The 'bots love Pearl because she gave them a mint in the theater. She checks on the castle and finds Mike, Observer, and Bobo drinking beers. She switches places back over the 'bots objections; they are very mad when Mike returns.
- Segment Three: A group of Servos perform the madrigal "Air on a Delta Knight". They take control and sing a naughty song when movie sign sounds.
- Segment Four: "Leonardo da Vinci" (Bill Corbett) visits the Hexfield to tell the crew that his portrayal in the movie is way off base. Tom keeps asking him questions, and he evades them; Mike has to tell Tom to stop asking what Leonardo does.
- Segment Five: The 'bots miss Pearl; Mike tries to comfort them. Down in the castle, the Delta Knights have booked it for their pancake breakfasts. That's all they do now, pancake breakfasts. They make enough money for next year's pancake breakfast. One of them throws hard candy and hurts a lot of people.
- Stinger: "I'm cominnnnnngggggg!"
- Michael J. Nelson - Mike Nelson
- Mary Jo Pehl - Pearl Forrester
- Bill Corbett - Crow T. Robot / Brain Guy
- Kevin Murphy - Tom Servo / Professor Bobo
- Patrick Brantseg - Gypsy (voice)
- Bill Corbett - Leonardo da Vinci
- Patrick Brantseg - Fred "Eggs" Eggleston
- Paul Chaplin - Chief Delta Knight
- This episode features Pearl Forrester's only appearance in the theater in a regular episode. (She also visits in the 1st Annual Summer Blockbuster Review.) She riffs the first movie segment with Crow and Tom as an experiment while Mike is in Castle Forrester with Observer and Bobo. Later, she returns to the theater while Mike & the Bots are watching the end credits.
- During Host Segment Two, Mike, Observer, and Bobo have a clearly-identifiable bottle of Glenlivet whiskey on the table in front of them. There does not seem to have been an effort made to modify or obscure the bottle's label.
- The final host segment features over thirty individuals on the Castle Forrester set. This would be the largest group of people shown in an MST3K scene at one time until At the Earth's Core.
- The episode was screened by Joel Hodgson as part of the #MakeMoreMST3K: Livestream #III. He was joined by Mary Jo Pehl and other members of the new casts. During the event, Joel stated that he had not seen this episode before.
- "Witchiepoo cracks down on Pufnstuf!"
- The 1969 children's TV show H.R. Pufnstuf is the first Sid and Marty Krofft live-action, life-sized-puppet program. In 1970, they produced Pufnstuf, a movie based on the show. Witchiepoo, the primary antagonist of the series, is a wicked but ineffective witch who rides a large rocket-powered broom with a steering wheel. She is mean to everyone, even her henchmen, whom she constantly whacks with her wand. Yet when faced with failure, she usually starts to pity herself by asking "Why me?"
- "Touched down in the land of the Delta Knights!"
- The original lyric, "Touched down in the land of the Delta Blues", comes from Marc Cohn's 1990 gospel-like hit "Walking in Memphis". It was covered in 1996 by Cher.
- "Joan Blondell!"
- Joan Blondell established herself as a Pre-Code staple of Warner Bros. Pictures in wisecracking, sexy roles, appearing in more than 100 films and television productions. She was most active in film during the 1930s and early 1940s.
- "Well, better than Quest of the Delta Burkes, I suppose."
- A former Miss Florida, actress Delta Burke is best known for her role as Suzanne Sugerbaker on the sitcom Designing Women (1986–1993).
- "Dagnabbit, Lukie!"
- The village has a Ozarks/hillbilly feel to it, and the sitcom The Real McCoys (1957–63), from which this line comes, features the original "hillbillies move out west" plot, years before The Beverly Hillbillies (1962–71).
- "This just sounds like a movie that should have Matthew Broderick in it."
- Actor Matthew Broderick has appeared in dozens of films, quite often (but not always) in light, whimsical roles (inspiring Crow's comment). He is perhaps best known for his portrayal of the title character in Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986).
- "Oh, the lead singer for Canned Heat."
- The Los Angeles blues-rock group Canned Heat was formed in 1966 by blues historians and record collectors Alan "Blind Owl" Wilson and Bob "The Bear" Hite, with the large Hite as lead singer. Their hits included "On the Road Again" (1968), "Goin' Up the Country" (1968), and "Let's Work Together" (1970).
- "Ashley Wilkes is comin' a-callin'."
- Ashley Wilkes is one of Scarlett O'Hara's suitors in Margaret Mitchell's 1936 novel Gone With the Wind.
- "Gregg Allman for sale, here!"
- While Allman had some success as a solo act (with 1977's Playin' Up a Storm being his most successful album), he was better known as the lead singer/organist/songwriter for the Allman Brothers Band, which was founded by his brother Duane. Their biggest hit was 1973's "Ramblin' Man".
- "Next up: Pippi Longstocking."
- Pippi Longstocking is a Swedish children's book character created by Astrid Lindgren. First appearing in 1945, Pippi is a red-haired young girl portrayed as adventurous, independent, and extremely athletic (strong enough to lift a horse above her head).
- "Yeah, yo quiero Taco Bell, whatever."
- In 1998, fast-food chain Taco Bell introduced Gidget the chihuahua in its ads. The little dog would show up wherever a Taco Bell food was being consumed and say, "Yo quiero Taco Bell!" ("I want Taco Bell!") with a computer generated mouth and a voice provided by actor Carlos Alazraqui.
- "He's the lost member of ZZ Top."
- The Southern blues-rock band ZZ Top was formed in 1970 in Houston, Texas. They are known for their long beards and ubiquitous sunglasses and hats.
- "I'll see if Bombadil has a place to crash."
- Tom Bombadil is character with magical abilities in the The Lord of the Rings novels. He is an enigmatic figure who lives in the depths of the Old Forest and seems to possess unequaled power in the land around his dwelling.
- "It's Joe Walsh! Aaah!"
- Joe Walsh is a musician known for his work with several successful bands including The Eagles and James Gang. He also had a recurring role on the TV sitcom The Drew Carey Show. He has a reputation for having a disheveled appearance and engaging in recreational narcotics use.
- "Robert Bork takes a constitutional!"
- Robert Bork was a controversial conservative judge who was nominated for a seat on the U.S. Supreme Court in 1987, but voted down in Congress. He was heavyset and had distinctive chin whiskers. A "constitutional" is a term for a leisurely stroll intended as moderate exercise.
- "Now I'm going to attach Rosey Grier's head to your shoulder."
- In the 1972 movie The Thing with Two Heads, the head of an older Caucasian man (played by Ray Milland) is grafted onto the shoulder of an athletic African-American man (played by former professional football player Rosey Grier).
- "And during the day, I'm a Stevie Nicks impersonator."
- Stevie Nicks was a key member of the rock group Fleetwood Mac and also had a solo career. She is known for wearing long, flowing, semi-transparent clothes.
- "Hey, a wheat penny!"
- Among coin collectors, the term "wheat penny" refers to pennies minted between 1909 and 1958.
- "Master Bojangles!"
- The song "Mr. Bojangles" is about a man who dances to keep his spirits high, even in unpleasant situations. Written and originally recorded by Jerry Jeff Walker in 1968, he was inspired when he met a street singer named Bojangles in a New Orleans drunk tank.
- "Bring in 'da noise, bring in 'da funk."
- Conceived and directed by George C. Wolfe with choreography by Savion Glover, the tap-dancing-centric stage musical Bring in 'Da Noise, Bring in 'Da Funk opened off-Broadway in 1995 to rave reviews.
- "Alan Hale!"
- Minus the long hair, the actress somewhat resembles actor Alan Hale Jr., who is best known for his co-starring role as Captain Jonas Grumby (The Skipper) on the 1960s series Gilligan's Island.
- "I've got to get back to the New Power Generation."
- "Never ask Bootsy Collins if you can borrow a coat."
- Bootsy Collins is a funk musician known for his flamboyant style of dress.
- "We've rounded up a number of suspects." "Including Kevin Spacey."
- In the 1995 film The Usual Suspects, Kevin Spacey portrays petty con artist Roger "Verbal" Kint, who, through flashback and narration, tells an interrogator a convoluted story of events that led him and his criminal companions to the crime scene, and of a mysterious crime lord—known as Keyser Söze—who controlled them. Further events in the story make these accounts unreliable; in a twist ending, a police sketch identifies Kint and Söze as one and the same.
- "It's a map of England!" "...Dan and John Ford Coley!"
- England Dan and John Ford Coley were a soft rock duo best known for their 1976 hit "I'd Really Love to See You Tonight".
- "How is it coming, O Great One?" "Do you ever get back to Edmonton?"
- Wayne Gretzky, whose nickname was "The Great One", played for the Edmonton Oilers.
- "Yes, I've got it." "I've got the role in Mad About You."
- After this film, actor Richard Kind (Wamthool) gained fame as a cast member of the TV sitcom Mad About You, which was already in production at the time this movie was released.
- "Get me—I'm Saint Sebastian."
- Saint Sebastian was an early Christian saint and martyr. He was initially tied to a post or tree and shot with arrows, though this did not kill him.
- "He came *this* close to being Leonardo da Gary, Indiana."
- Gary is a city in northwestern Indiana known for its high crime rates, being Michael Jackson's hometown, and being the subject of the eponymous song in the musical The Music Man.
- Refers to the NFL team, the Green Bay Packers. Also a call back to a running joke in The Giant Spider Invasion.
- "Jimmy Carter was in office."
- Jimmy Carter is an American politician who was the 39th President of the United States from 1977–1981.
- "Halt, Sir Dan of Blocker!"
- Actor Dan Blocker is known for his role as "Hoss" Cartwright, one of the sons on the long-running Western TV series Bonanza (1959–1973). Hoss was heavyset and typically wore a large hat, much like the townsperson here.
- Crow: Well, better than "Quest of the Delta Burke", I suppose
- Narrator: Many years ago, terror stalked the land, making life harsh, unfair, and treacherous.
- Crow: Jimmy Carter was in office.
- [David Warner appears.]
- Crow [as David Warner]: [apologetic] In it for the money, folks.
- [As wizard Baydool drags Travis ("Tee") away from the slave market crowd and into his shack, he tries to get him to talk.]
- Baydool: ¿Como te llamas?
- Servo [as Tee]: Yeah, yo quiero Taco Bell, whatever.
- . . .
- Baydool: Comment vous-appelez vous?
- Crow [as Tee]: Je m'appelle… Bite Me!
- [Afraid of Baydool, Tee runs out the door.]
- Pearl [as Tee]: I'll see if Bombadil has a place to crash.
- Tee: I was taught that those who I respect, who are wise, I should call "master".
- Crow [as Tee]: Right, Mr. Bater?
- [Baydool scares off an intruder by throwing the contents of his chamber pot at him.]
- Pearl: Ew, wizard whiz!
- Crow: Drain the wizard!
- [Tee stops Baydool just as a hammer falls from a roof in front of them.]
- Servo [as Tee]: Please, hammer, don't hurt 'im!
- [Lord Vultare has an audience with the Mannerjay while slaves fan her.]
- Servo [as Slave]: Do you want me to oscillate, Ma'am?
- . . .
- Lord Vultare: We've rounded up a number of suspects.
- Crow [as Vultare]: …including Kevin Spacey.
- Lord Vultare: I'm certain some of them are spies for the Order.
- Mannerjay: What of the map?
- Lord Vultare: No word. It seems…
- Pearl [as Vultare]: …chilly in here. Could you turn down your guy?
- [Baydool shows Tee some blow darts.]
- Baydool: These will put anyone to sleep in no time.
- Crow: They're tiny James Michener books!
- [After another attack by Vultare's thugs ends in failure.]
- Tom: The Vikings in this movie don't vike very well.
- [Tee, Leonardo and Thena set off on horseback after a confusing scene of exposition.]
- Servo: Well, this movie has lost me. It's lost me and it's trotting off without me.
- [After Tee and Leonardo are recaptured by the forest Prince, a noisy, loony henchman drops out of the trees in belated pursuit.]
- Loony Henchman: I'm com-iiiing!
- Mike [as The Prince]: Put a sock in it, Legolas!
- Tee: When in doubt, rest.
- Crow: You are full of crap beyond your years, kid.
- [Tee sets up an explosive device at the mouth of the Storehouse.]
- Servo: Tee pities the fool who gets in his way.
- [Vultare is reading what appears to be Archimedes' plans for his high-tech weapon.]
- Servo [as Vultare]: Enjoy much scientific pleasure with magnificent operation.
A home video release of this episode is not currently forthcoming. However, the host segments are available on the Satellite Dishes disc included in Volume XXXIX. On August 1st, 2020, the episode was streamed on the official MST3K Twitch channel and has since been added to the ShoutFactoryTV website.
|preceded by: Season 8||MST3K Season 9||followed by: Season 10|
|901||The Projected Man||1998-03-14||906||The Space Children||1998-06-13||911||Devil Fish||1998-08-15|
|902||The Phantom Planet||1998-03-21||907||Hobgoblins||1998-06-27||912||The Screaming Skull||1998-08-29|
|903||The Pumaman||1998-04-04||908||The Touch of Satan||1998-07-11||913||Quest of the Delta Knights||1998-09-26|
|905||The Deadly Bees||1998-05-09||910||The Final Sacrifice||1998-07-25|