MST3K Love Theme

The "MST3K Love Theme" is the main theme song of Mystery Science Theater 3000, which serves to summarize the general concept and backstory behind the show as well as set the mood. The lyrics are occasionally altered to reflect changes in the cast or plot, but the song has been present in every season of the show; though some edits to the lyrics are minor, such as What the bots say during the "Robot Roll-call" or the change between Season 1 and the KTMA season of "We'll send him cheesy movies, the worst ever made" to "The worst we can find" and other changes that do not reflect any change in the show's plot.

Lyrics

KTMA

In the not-too-distant future

Next Sunday A.D.

There was a guy named Joel

Not too different than you or me

He worked in a satellite loading bay

Just polishing switches, to pay his way

He did his job well with a cheerful face

But his bosses didn't like him so they shot him into space!

"We'll send him cheesy movies!

The worst ever made!"

Joel says when you've got lemons,

you make lemonade

Now keep in mind he can't control

Where the movies begin or end

Because he used the extra parts

To make his robot friends.

Robot Roll Call

Cambot!

Servo!

Gypsy!

Crow!

If you're wondering how he eats and breathes

And other science facts,

Then repeat to yourself, "It's just a show

I should really just relax"

For Mystery Science Theater 3000!

Episodes 101 to 512

In the not-too-distant future

Next Sunday A.D.

There was a guy named Joel

Not too different from you or me

He worked at Gizmonic Institute

Just another face in a red jumpsuit.

He did a good job cleaning up the place,

But his bosses didn't like him so they shot him into space!

"We'll send him cheesy movies!

The worst we can find! (la la la)

He'll have to sit and watch them all

And we'll monitor his mind!" (la la la)

Now keep in mind Joel can't control

Where the movies begin or end (la la la),

Because he used those special parts

To make his robot friends.

Robot Roll Call (alright let's go)

Cambot! (Pan left!)

Gypsy! (Hi, girl!)

Tom Servo! (What a cool guy!)

Crooooow! (Oh, wisecracker!)

If you're wondering how he eats and breathes

And other science facts (la la la),

Then repeat to yourself, "It's just the show

I should really just relax"

For Mystery Science Theater 3000!

Episodes 513 - 624

In the not-too-distant future

Way down in Deep 13

Dr. Forrester and TV's Frank

Were hatching an evil scheme!

They hired a temp by the name of Mike

Just a regular joe they didn't like

Their experiment needed a good test case

So they conked him on the noggin and they shot him into space! (Get...me...doooown!)

"We'll send him cheesy movies!

The worst we can find! (la la la)

He'll have to sit and watch them all

And we'll monitor his mind!" (la la la)

Now keep in mind Mike can't control

Where the movies begin or end (la la la).

He'll try to keep his sanity

With the help of his robot friends!

Robot Roll Call

Cambot! (Cover yourself!)

Gypsy! (I'm not ready!)

Tom Servo! (Hello there!)

Crooooow! (That's one "o!")

If you're wondering how he eats and breathes

And other science facts (la la la),

Then repeat to yourself, "It's just a show

I should really just relax"

For Mystery Science Theater 3000!

Episodes 701 - 706

In the not-too-distant future

Way down in Deep 13

The evil Dr. Forrester

Was hatching a nasty scheme!

He hired a temp by the name of Mike

Just a regular joe he didn't like

His experiment needed a good test case

So he conked him on the noggin and he shot him into space! (Get...me...doooown!)

"I'll send him cheesy movies!

The worst I can find! (la la la)

He'll have to sit and watch them all

And we'll monitor his mind!" (la la la)

Now keep in mind Mike can't control

Where the movies begin or end (la la la).

He'll try to keep his sanity

With the help of his robot friends!

Robot Roll Call

Cambot! (Cover yourself!)

Gypsy! (I'm not ready!)

Tom Servo! (Hello there!)

Crooooow! (That's one "o!")

If you're wondering how he eats and breathes

And other science facts (la la la),

Then repeat to yourself "It's just a show

I should really just relax."

Dr. Forrester: (spoken) Did I tell you my mother's here?

For Mystery Science Theater 3000!

Episodes 801 to 913

In the not-too-distant future

Somewhere in time and space,

Mike Nelson and his robot pals

Are caught in an endless chase!

Pursued by a woman whose name is Pearl,

An evil gal who wants to rule the world.

She threw a few things in her purse

And in her rocketship she hunts him all across the universe! (I'll...get...youuuuuuu!)

Pearl: I'll send him cheesy movies!

The worst I can find! (la la la)

He'll have to sit and watch them all

And I'll monitor his mind! (la la la)

Now keep in mind Mike can't control

Where the movies begin or end (la la la).

He'll try to keep his sanity

With the help of his robot friends!

Robot Roll Call

Cambot! (You're on!)

Gypsy! (Oh, my stars!)

Tom Servo! (Check me out!)

Crooooow! (I'm different!)

If you're wondering how he eats and breathes

And other science facts (la la la),

Then repeat to yourself, "It's just a show

I should really just relax"

For Mystery Science Theater 3000!

Episodes 1001 - 1013

In the not-too-distant future

Somewhere in time and space,

Mike Nelson and his robot pals

Are caught in a nasty place!

They try to survive the wrath of Pearl,

Just an evil gal who wants to rule the world.

From her castle below, she sets her sights above

Just to torture all her captives on the Satellite of Love! (Get...me...doooown!)

Pearl: I'll send him cheesy movies!

The worst I can find! (la la la)

He'll have to sit and watch them all

And I'll monitor his mind! (la la la)

Now keep in mind Mike can't control

Where the movies begin or end (la la la).

He'll try to keep his sanity

With the help of his robot friends!

Robot Roll Call

Cambot! (You're on!)

Gypsy! (Oh, my stars!)

Tom Servo! (Check me out!)

Crooooow! (I'm different!)

If you're wondering how he eats and breathes

And other science facts (la la la),

Then repeat to yourself, "It's just a show

I should really just relax"

For Mystery Science Theater 3000!

Season 11

note: text in red is heard during the show open, but is not present on the released version of the song

Har Mar Superstar: In the not-too-distant future

Max (spoken): Mayday! Mayday! Mayday! We need your help!

Jonah (spoken): Someone needs my help.

Next Sunday, AD

Max (spoken): Mayday! Mayday!

There was a guy named Jonah

Not too different from you or me

He worked at Gizmonic Institute

Just another mug in a yellow jumpsuit

Jonah (spoken): Hello? Hello! What the heck?

Har Mar: A distress call came in for him at half-past noon

That's when an evil woman trapped him on the dark side of the moon

Kinga: I'll send him cheesy movies

The worst I can find (la la la)

He'll have to sit and watch them all

And we'll monitor his mind (la la la)

Har Mar: Now keep in mind that Jonah can't control

When the movies begin or end (la la la)

So he'll have to keep his sanity

With the help of his robot friends

Chorus: Robot Roll Call

Cambot!

Gypsy!

Tom Servo!

Crooooow!

Har Mar: If you're wondering how he eats and breathes

And other science facts (la la la),

Then repeat to yourself, "It's just a show

I should really just relax"

For Mystery Science Theater 3000!

Notes

• In the "Turn down your lights" part of the theme, one can hear a very faint version of the theme song playing.
• In seasons 8-10, Crow says "I'm different!", referring to the fact that he was now being voiced by Bill Corbett instead of Trace Beaulieu
• An update on the "Bring Back MST3K" Kickstarter project shows a storyboard from a new episode that confirmed that the "Love Theme" would be back for the new season of MST3K. (See the "First Look: The New Opening Sequence!" section on that page.)

Dr. F (Season 2-5 Intro)

Cambot's Intro

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